Why Were Social Workers So Nasty?

The following are some of the things that cause observers to wonder whether it was lesbians or other women who dislike men intensely that caused the problems for the Howards.

Told to Leave Husband

The Howards were just a normal, average family until Thursday, October 28, 1999. On that day a nurse that Heidi had never seen before arrived out-of-the-blue and told her to leave her husband.

This was the first contact they had ever had with anyone from the state. It was a nurse from the Visiting Nurses Association who was sent by Spaulding Rehab Center in Boston to see whether their house would be suitable for their new, terminally-ill baby.

The infant, Faith, had been born in August with a rare neurological disorder which meant she would not live very long. She had been in an institution since her birth.

The VNA nurse called only a few minutes before arriving at the house. She insisted upon coming even though she was told the kitchen was gutted and the appliances were in the living room. Heidi and the boys were going to stay with relatives for the weekend so Neil could finish the work.

When the nurse arrived, she said she had never seen such a mess and she would have to send a report to DSS in order to “protect” the boys whom she had never met.

Before leaving, the nurse told Heidi she should leave her husband. That message was constant throughout the ordeal.

From the many families MassNews has interviewed, we have found that many of the women are told by DSS they must leave and divorce their husband – or they will never see their children again.

Forced to Get Restraining Order and Divorce . . . or Else

When Heidi and the boys went to her sister-in-law’s house that night for the weekend, she had no idea it would be weeks before she would be able to return.

The DSS responded very quickly to the report from the Visiting Nurse. They telephoned Heidi the next day at her sister-in-law’s and ordered her not to go home until they investigated.

On Wednesday, a DSS social worker visited the sister-in-law’s home and interrogated her and the boys. She ordered Heidi to get a restraining order against her husband. When Heidi refused, the worker said,

“Then I guess we’ll just have to take your kids away.”

Heidi was terrified at the prospect of losing her children. She said she just wanted to go home. The investigator said she was really concerned now because Heidi wanted to go home after hearing that her husband was a dangerous man. She assured Heidi the restraining order would only be temporary until the investigation was completed. She told her not to worry about being homeless, DSS will take care of that.

She was pressured to get the restraining order as quickly as possible. They could set her up in an apartment, and she could have her children there with her until this was cleared up. “I don’t care how you do it, I don’t care what you say, just get it,” said the social worker.

Heidi reluctantly agreed to get a restraining order so DSS wouldn’t take her children as they had threatened.

The next day at the Woburn District Court, a female “victim witness advocate” showed her how to fill out the form for a restraining order. She was advised that she had to write something about being in fear. She could not just put down that DSS told her to get the restraining order. Heidi was told, “You have to make it sound bad.” So Heidi lied because it was the only way she would be allowed to keep her children.

While Heidi was waiting for the order to be prepared, the “advocate” gave her a card from the poverty lawyers, the Greater Boston Legal Services, and told her she should get a free divorce. “Call one of these lawyers,” she urged.

Meanwhile, Neil was in great agony, but he couldn’t see Heidi because of the restraining or he would be arrested.

After a few weeks, Heidi could not stand it any longer and called Neil to tell him she wanted to come home. The next day, which was the day before Thanksgiving, she went to a judge and tried to vacate the order but was told that DSS would have to approve it. Finally, the judge partially vacated the order and told her she could go home.

The Thanksgiving weekend was a wonderful time away from DSS and all their problems.

DSS Got Serious

DSS had not forgotten the Howards nor their disobedience.

On Monday, November 29, 1999, two social workers were standing in the living room when Heidi came from the bathroom. They left after interrogating her and the children. They returned later in the day with police and paramedics.

Heidi was taken by DSS in an ambulance to Lowell and Emerson Hospital for a psychiatric evaluation.

Neil was arrested when he arrived home from work.

Both boys were taken into custody by DSS and separated.

It would be over two years before they would all see each other again.

Heidi had learned, as have many others, that if you refuse to leave your husband, the children are swiftly taken – just as they had threatened.

Tormented to Leave Husband

Heidi was an emotional wreck when she arrived at the psychiatric unit at Emerson Hospital, Concord. Her life was disintegrating before her eyes. Her husband was in jail, DSS had both boys, her baby girl was dying and she was being locked up in a psychiatric ward. They gave her a tranquilizer, which knocked her out.

Heidi woke up groggily at two in the morning. A social worker immediately began questioning her. The social worker told Heidi she was a battered woman and that is why she was upset and stressed. Heidi said her husband never hit her. The social worker told her, “You don’t need to be beaten to be battered.”

The Howards later found a notation written by a social worker in the records at Emerson Hospital, “Collaborate w/DSS, file 51As as needed.” DSS had already informed Emerson that Neil violated a restraining order and Heidi was a “battered woman.” Heidi woke up again two hours later at four in the morning and they questioned her once more.

Whatever Heidi said about her relationship with her husband, the social worker told her it was typical of a batterer. For instance, she told them that Neil handled the finances. They responded that he was controlling her and manipulative. Heidi said, “We don’t go around beating the children, we would never go too far in our discipline.” The social worker twisted her words writing, “They have to stop each other if they go too far.”

Heidi was awakened again at eight a.m., exhausted and still drugged, and was interviewed at nine. She told them she was the problem, not her husband. They told her she was in denial. Exasperated, she told them she was hurt by what was happening and they had destroyed her life. She wanted to run away and start over, she didn’t care about anything or anyone anymore.

She thought her communications were confidential, but Emerson filed a 51A against the Howards. Those statements kept popping up everywhere in court reports and other places. “The fabricated 51A keeps coming back to haunt me,” she said. “It won’t stop. The longer you have contact with these people, they keep generating 51As against you.”

Heidi wanted to go home. They would not let her leave unless she had an “Aftercare Program.”

A week later, under heavy pressure from her handlers at DSS, she renewed the restraining order for a week.

After two weeks at the hospital, there was a hearing to allow DSS to keep the children. Both she and Neil, who were not allowed to communicate with each other, signed releases to allow DSS to keep the children. Neil was advised by his state-appointed lawyer, who is almost always a part of the system, that he should cooperate and not make anyone angry.

“Listen,” he was told. “Sign the waiver. Heidi is signing it too. This will all get straightened out. A court investigator will look into this. If you testify today, you’ll have Heidi’s DSS attorney and the children’s attorney against you. Once the court investigator does their job, you won’t have to testify.” Neil thought that made sense at the time. He was positive an investigation by the court would clear him.

After doing all that was requested – in the hope of getting her children back – Heidi was released from the hospital the next day, December 15, and transferred to a shelter in Springfield so she would be far from the “batterer.” She called Neil and told him that her plan to get the children was not working because they were now telling her that Springfield was too far away.

So Heidi went to Boston, visited Faith and met Neil. DSS refused to allow her to see the boys. She tried to get the restraining order removed but the court refused unless DSS was present. On December 23, the order was removed without DSS showing up and Heidi went home again.

On the day before Christmas, Heidi and Neil visited their children at the DSS office.

Children Were Gone As DSS Promised

It was now obvious that DSS was not going to give the children back after Heidi had scorned DSS and returned to her husband. They were going to adopt both children out and get bonus money from the federal government for doing so.

The Howards kept visiting their children, whenever they were allowed, all through the year 2000 and kept praying for a miracle.

Their son, Christopher, was told that he was not going home to his family and would be adopted by another family. Ethan’s foster mother was planning to adopt him.

In January they decided to get legal counsel who would really work for them and they hired Atty. Greg Hession.

The lies and perverted things that DSS did to this young family are beyond description and beyond belief. They are reported in detail beginning in the March 2001 issue of MassNews.

After DSS learned in January that Heidi had a new baby, Jessica, they took that baby away also without reason, but not before they had Heidi and Neil arrested and put into wrist and ankle cuffs and forced to march up and down stairs through the Lowell Courthouse.

The many things that DSS did are too much to recount. Much more of their story is in the MassNews archives. Finally with the help of Atty. Chester Darling, who joined Greg Hession last year, DSS was forced to leave them alone after 50 legal hearings. Today, they are almost totally reunited as a family.

But one nagging question remains: “When the Russians put innocent people into psychiatric hospitals because they were upsetting the government officials, everyone was outraged. Now that we are doing the same in Concord, Massachusetts, at Emerson Hospital, does anyone care?”